Ep. 41 [Repost] - Most People Do, What Most People Do

This week I decided to repost an article from a few months ago. Partly out of laziness, and partly because I believe it's a great reminder as we all enter the New Year.

Most people

• 38% of marriages end in divorce.
• The average Canadian household owes $1.71 for every dollar they earn.
• Pre-pandemic Canadians saved an average of 1.38% of disposable income.
• 20% of Canadians don't pay off their credit card balance.
• The majority of people hate their jobs (my own interpretation).
• Common thought: "You should spend 3 months' salary on the engagement ring."

These are alarming stats of 'most people' in Canada. The majority of people follow a script. The script has been laid out and crammed down our throats for generations. It's a system of control that creates a predictable social contract. And when individuals go off script, society instantly attempts to push them back to equilibrium.

The script goes as follows; we are supposed to finish high-school, attend university or college (or enter a trade), get a job, climb the corporate ladder, get married, buy a house, finance a car or three, and have children. All before we turn thirty. But clearly, the script isn't working. Society has never been more anxious, stressed, depressed, and sleep-deprived than it is right now.

So why do we keep trudging down this path? Why do we keep doing the things we're supposed to do when they're not working? The current script is broken. It's time we realize these mistakes. It's time we go off script and live authentically.

I understand that people are okay with the status-quo. They don't mind having average relationships, floating debt, and keeping up with the Joneses.

Why? It's easy.

But I truly don't understand that. Why settle? Why have an average relationship when you can have an amazing relationship? Why put yourself through an average job instead of pursuing a passion? It's because the status-quo is easy. No one questions it. We hear something like, "well that's just life."

Well, it doesn't have to be.

Swimming against the current

Going off-script is challenging. We get questioned from friends and family, and we face constant societal pressure. But the greatest feats in life are achieved when we swim against the current, carve our own path, and actively build our life. Actively building my life is something I think about often. It's a practice I put hours of work into each week. I know the person I want to be, so I do the things that person would do. It's actually quite simple, but harder in practice. It takes diligent work, and lots of it.

I don't want to owe more than I earn. I want to save 75% of my income, not 1.38%. And I want to pay off my credit card in full every month. I want to love what I do, not wake up every morning dreading the day and living for the weekend. Alterations are made in my daily habits in order for these goals to come to fruition.

I've received numerous questions in the past from friends, and extended family; when are you getting engaged? When are you buying a house? When will you settle down? Why don't you buy a new car? Well, my partner and I will get engaged when the time is right, I don't care about owning a house, my car is fine, and I've never understood the concept of 'settling down'. When this occurs, I usually have the same response for everything; *awkward laughter* "when the time is right". For the vast majority, this is swimming against the current, going off script, and largely incomprehensible.

Begin to question common principles. For most, I think you'll come to realize there is more optionality in life than we appreciate. There are off-script options that far exceed the common. Think about the most amazing people you know - whether it be the most successful financially, the fittest, or someone who retains the best relationships. I guarantee they do life differently. They swim against the current.

Ignoring the Signals

There are numerous signals in life. It's common to think that one should be graduated university by twenty-two, married with children before they're thirty, $100k salary by thirty, and so on. But this is just noise. Many people go to university when they're twenty-five, or don't go at all, and their life is amazing. Many people marry when they're forty (or never) and have children later on. And, many people build companies, bleed cash for years, and then sell it for one big win as opposed to chasing that addictive (and toxic) salary.

Ignoring the signals ultimately comes down to less comparison. Comparison is mentally exhausting, and ultimately a killer. It creates jealousy, which in turn creates unhappiness.

Don't be most people

The majority of our population walks around zombified everyday of the week. They wake up, have a quick breakfast, hop on the bus, arrive at a job they don't like, 'work' for 8 hours, go home, order take-out, watch TV, go to bed, rinse, and repeat. Then we wonder why we're anxious, depressed, and unfulfilled. Well, look at the script. The script sucks.

Don't be most people. Live authentically. Find what makes you tick, and double down on it.